What did grief feel like to me?

Everyone experiences grief differently for many reasons such as: culture, relationship with your loved one, past experiences with grief and how the loss occurred just to name a few. The one thing that we generally have in common is the hurt and pain in our hearts. Personally, I felt alone, empty inside, had a hard time concentrating and functioning at work was a struggle. I just wanted to stay home, crawl under the blankets and just slip away. I lived with anxiety and fear and didn’t want my other children out of my sight. There were times when I was even afraid to leave my house. I missed my son so much and prayed for a visit from him. In the first year of grief, I begged God to send him back and I really thought he just might.